16 Nov 2017 31 comments

Getting Some Headspace.

Sometimes I feel like I should have it all sussed by now. Here I am, about to enter my late twenties (oh my god pleeease, that cannot be right) and married… and yet I still struggle with bouts of anxiety and negative thoughts! I’m sure everyone can relate to this – sometimes, especially when I’m hormonal or having a busy week, I wake up and my heart is pounding before I’ve even opened my eyes!

Between the demands of daily life, running a business and y’know, sleeping, socialising and all that, I often feel so overwhelmed by everything I take on. I spend a lot of time on social media, which really cannot be good for anyone, and it occasionally leads to a bit of (v counterproductive) envy and comparing. I hate those feelings, I truly only ever want to be the kind of person who is completely elated when they see their friends doing well – and 99% of the time, I am that person! But occasionally I entertain the negative thoughts and things go a little awry.

I’ve really had to work at this whole mental health thing, I didn’t always have such a strong sense of self and sometimes I look back at how I was even six months ago and wonder how I managed. The old me seems so fragile!
Becoming more in tune with yourself and understanding your own negative thought patterns takes a lot of time and self-restraint, but I wanted to share a few everyday techniques that have helped me a lot.

Sweat It Out

I know, I hate me for being this person too…. BUT, it’s true. Exercise really, really does wonders for your body and mind. On my mental health days, I have to convince myself to even get out of bed, so thinking about leaving my cosy home for the GYM of all places is just… unbearable.
Anyway, bargaining is key and I tell myself that if I’m truly hating life after ten minutes then I can leave. I always end up lasting longer, and I love the walk to the gym – just me and a beaut little pop punk playlist – so it’s never, ever something I regret doing.
After a workout I’m on a high and feeling my best, and I also find that I’m just too tired to agonise over things that may never happen! Kate – 1 0 – anxiety.

Try A New Approach

A little while ago I decided to take up meditation. How weird does that sound? Like, I feel a bit embarrassed to tell people that.
Anyway, I’m sure we’ve all downloaded the Headspace App on a whim, thought “what the fuck am I doing?” and deleted it that same day. Well, I re-downloaded it and got to work *smug face*. I did it for ten days in a row (because you get 10 sessions free and I’m cheap) and I hate to admit it you guys, but I was feeling better!
I really like the dudes calming voice (I googled him, he looks a lot different to how you’d expect) and the analogies are awesome – there’s a short video that explains that life is sort of like sitting at the side of a busy road, and your thoughts are the cars that are speeding along. It’s so tempting to feel overwhelmed by the vehicles whizzing by, so much so that you may eventually run in to the road and that’s when chaos ensues.
What meditation teaches you is that it’s okay to see those cars whizzing by, to acknowledge the busyness of it all and just let the thoughts happen. That really struck a chord with me, and now I work to recognise or acknowledge the bad thoughts without letting them get to me. It feels a bit like it’s easier to filter out the valueless thoughts from the rest, knowing when to act and when to ignore.

I like to think of myself as a work in progress, and any changes I make (big or small) are helping me in the long run to become a happier, healthier person. Anything I can do to improve on myself is going to make an impact in the long run.

Do What You Can To Get By

One thing I find hard about working for myself, or maybe even just trying to build a career as a woman in general, is that you always feel guilty when you’re not working. At the weekends, I’m pretty relaxed but 9-6 Monday to Friday, I feel like I always need to be working, and working hard.
Eventually I kind of burnt myself out, and I came to realise the importance of a mental health day – or even a mental health morning or hour.
There’s no point forcing yourself through work or life or whatever if you’re not feeling great mentally, so now I tend to take some time out to get some zen. I can always make it up that evening or over the weekend, but if I really need time away from life, I give myself it.
This is probably my biggest come-to-Jesus moment recently; realising that I shouldn’t feel guilty for looking after my mental health.

I’ve definitely seen an improvement in myself even over the last year, I think some things do just come with time and getting older but I know there’s also a lot I can do to help myself too. It’s a bit of a journey, but one to stick at!
How do you get some headspace? Got any tips to add?

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  • I love that you’ve started meditating, I do it everyday and it definitely helps me get some space between me and my constant thoughts! Have you ever tried yoga? xx


  • I keep hearing so many good things about this Headspace app but so far I’ve stayed cynical… Maybe I should follow in your footsteps and give it a try – at least for those first (free) 10 days! It’s so important to look after your mental health – thank you for the important reminder! xx

    Laura // Middle of Adventure

  • I’ve always been prone to comparing myself to others and feeling all that self doubt. It’s horrible and exhausting but I’ve also been trying to do little things to help get away from those feelings. Listening to podcasts and spending some downtime has been helping! Lovely post 🙂 x

    Kayleigh | anenthusiasmfor.co.uk

  • 潜心学习,认真拜读!

  • I often feel anxious and overwhelmed and regularly doubt myself.. I might try the Headspace app and see how I get on. Great post xx

    Ioanna | Hearting.co.uk

  • annie

    Glad meditation’s helping. You shouldn’t be embarrassed. It’s just as important for health as physical exercise. x

  • Great post, loved reading! I have the Headspace app but haven’t started using it yet, definitely think it’ll be a great help for calming everything down when it comes to having such a busy mind!

    Anika | anikamay.co.uk

  • Simply a beautiful post … Merci for sharing your thoughts. ♥️👍♥️

    🍂🍃LA BIJOUX BELLA 🍂🍃| by mia | A Creative Lifestyle Blog

  • Great post!!! I can’t cope with meditation. idk Why. But I’m glad it worked for you 🙂

  • Zoe Wells

    I’ve been meditating since the start of the year and it really has helped. I tried Headspace but I use the calm app now as the woman’s voice is really soothing xx

  • i tried meditating about a week ago and it surprisingly helped so much! i pretty much just focused on my breathing and tried to not take mind to anything else, and i found much more clarity in my thoughts! it makes sense, because we’re thinking like, a million thoughts a minute and meditating gives us a chance to put that on pause for 5 or 10 minutes.

    becky @ star violet

  • I love the headspace app, it really helped me at a tough time and now I am subscribed! I don’t feel like I need it like I did back then but I really should use it just for general wellbeing! xx

    Frances Kayleigh | Fashion & Lifestyle

  • Diana Maria

    Headspace is amazing! Meditating has helped me so much, it can be difficult to get into and find that focus but you do eventually and it’s so relaxing. Ah late twenties, I’m in my early twenties but I know the day will come where I worry about that too! I think age really has little meaning when it comes to living your life, so I wouldn’t let that get you down! xx

    Sending light & love your way,

    My Lovelier Days

  • Caroline

    Omg, that guilty part of not being working my 8 daily hours, I can’t really manage it, I do my workouts 2 or 3 times a week (feeling guilty to do not more), I write sometimes my journal, writing helps tones, “Idid the morning pages”, I am trying to control a lot my negative thoughts in some aspects right now in my life, I have meditated and it helps a lot but now days I have to be in a critical way to meditate, trough years you know your anxiety and your thoughts, and you learn when you just feel anxious and which thoughts come from it and you learn to ignore them.

  • I’ve heard so much about the headspace app and never really gave it much thought because I am not super into meditation. However, I really want to try it out, so I’ll have to download it! Sweating it out can do wonders — hot yoga is my favorite way to get in a stretch and sweat!

    Mia | http://www.verymuchmia.com

    • I was the same, I think I thought you have to do it for hours but actually it’s a few minutes a day! I’d love to try hot yoga! x

  • I’ve heard about all of the benefits of meditating, and I’m glad it’s working for you Kate! I’ve been trying to have a better understanding of myself lately too, so I’m definitely going to look in to the app!

    XO, Elizabeth

  • having time to yourself and put in regular mental health and self-care times is so important. i have to have mornings to myself in order to work productively.


    • I’m the same, I love a chilled morning!

  • Its so important to give yourself a bit of time off and allow yourself some headspace!


    Ellie xx

  • Exercise is phenomenal


  • Just downloaded headspace – sounds interesting and like something I could end up enjoying if I stick with it! Going to give it a go tomorrow xx

  • Lilli Ferreira

    such a lovely post! anddddddddd… I am still not over your new blogdesign – so amazing!

    💘 Lilli
    check out my fashionblog: http://www.LilliFerreira.com

  • downloaded headspace a few days ago after someone recommended it to me, havent got round to doing it yet but hoping it will have the same effect on me!

    i definitely second the gym one though – a good workout always always always leaves me feeling a million times better!

    katie. xx lacoconoire.com

  • I am so interested in doing meditation but feel like I never have the time to sit down and do it, what with still living at home and sharing a room with my boyfriend so no peace and quiet! But i think it’s so important to take mental health breaks xx

  • When I’m feeling stressed or bad about myself, I always make sure to pray about it. I always feel better after I pray

    Chelle| http://www.chellebelle2016.blogspot.com

    • Nicole

      Yes, that’s the best

  • Lisa Autumn

    YES I love headspace.. such an amazing app!

    xx Lisa | lisaautumn.com

  • Sarah Ⓥ

    Loved this post! I only recently realised how important it is to take very good care of your mental health and that mental health days are just as important as taking a day off when you’re feeling physically ill


  • Nicole

    Read this at a timely moment, as I’ve felt so overwhelmed. So much so that I called in sick to work today because emotionally and mentally I am stressed and drained. These are good tips. I would add 1) Journaling. If you like to write like I do, writing out absolutely everything in your head is very therapeutic.

  • Alison Vella

    I’ve been living with eating disorders for years so the whole comparing on social media is totally me!
    Trying a new approach and picking up new hobbies has done wonders for my mental health and mindset.